I had feelings for a girl when I was in high school, but I didn’t know who I was because I didn’t have the language nor did I concern myself with the issues in the LGBT community; knowledge was not as widespread as it is nowadays. Back then you could say that I had an official relationship with that person. But after a few years, basically because of a lot of reasons, like we didn’t feel like we were a good match, we broke up in my first year of university. Technically I was dumped. It had to be my second year of college when I understood and was conscious about myself, identified as bisexual, and came out to more people.
When I came out to my close friends, they were pretty positive about it. They weren’t shocked or panicked like, “why did that happen?” but most people were pretty supportive and open about it. My colleagues were pretty surprised and asked me all sorts of questions to make sure I was sure or if I had had any relationships. I told them about my experience, that one relationship I had in high school, and they were pretty happy about it. Honestly, I didn’t know why I decided to tell people. I guess it was because I just started the job and everyone was pretty open-minded and straightforward, I myself wanted to get closer to everyone and not have anything to hide, so naturally, during a teambuilding session, I told everyone.
And it could be because of smoking weed. It was my first time smoking, and I felt strange like I could take it easy. After I came out, I felt relieved, a kind of feeling that was so close to happiness; I felt accepted. I have always determined that I cannot work in a discriminatory environment, no matter how great it is. I thought coming out was a chance to see if this job was worth it. So when I saw people’s reactions, I was so relieved, as if this was a good choice and I would not have chosen any differently.
Rồi Sẽ Ổn Thôi (“Gonna Be Alright”) is a project that collects coming out stories from the LGBTIQ+ community and their loved ones in Việt Nam. To find out more details or to read more stories from the project, please visit our official social media site on Instagram at ComingOutVN.